Background noise and static
Another week has gone by and no progress on the album art. I haven't even touched the file since last weekend tbh. It feels like the closer I get to completion, the slower I move towards the finish line. I'm like one sitting away and a feeeeww touch ups here and there from uploading this piece of shit album. I just want to put it all behind me, i swear to God.
This body of work, for the billionth time, represents a dead era of my life, where nothing was going as it should and was filled with burden. It's almost like the project doesn't want to release me from this despair I experienced and is subconsciously latching itself on to me as a parasite, forcing me to re engage with the negativity from that life. It's really not perfectionism thats holding me back, its more so, just knowing that I want to give it my all and I haven't yet. From the sample selection, beats, lyrics, vocals, mixing, mastering, all the way to the artwork and visual style, I want to make sure I don't leave any room for 'potential'. At the same time, I know my limit and how far I can go, so it's not like I'm gonna keep working on this forever (God I don't want to work on this forever). I've decided that this Sunday, after tomorrow, I will dedicate at least 1 hour to finalizing the cover art and it must be uploaded before I go to bed. It's time for this project to go.
Right now, life has been pretty weird. Due to previously mentioned unforeseen circumstances, I'm not sure if I will be able to record any new music in the near future. Which is a bummer, because I had this whole new style and direction planned out. But I am also taking it with grace and patience, because it's not the end of the world (yet). This is a time to rebalance my priorities, shift my perspectives towards other creative outlets. I wanna dedicate time to cranking out new beats, learning techniques and methods to making better sounding music. Drawing is another big focus of mine as well, really practicing and trying to improve intentionally. Also, just getting the freedom to discover and explore new hobbies or interests that may develop into later passions and pursuits. Since getting the new old digicam last week, I've been doing some light photography here and there. I also wanna put some work towards game development and further designing this website.
All in all, I am trying to make peace with my circumstances. You know, having the strength to change my wisdom and the serenity to know what I can't blah blah something like that... (I butchered the quote but you know what I'm talking about*). So we'll see how this next season of my life plays out.
*The quote is: "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference."
More Blogs.